Animal jokes
What do cows eat for breakfast? -- Moosli.
Where do cows keep their historical cultural artifacts?
In the mooseum.
What do you call a cow with two legs?
Lean beef.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.
Where do cows go on holiday? -- Moo Zealand.
What do you call a cow who plays an instrument? -- A moosician.
How does a cow become invisible? -- Through camooflage.
Why are theaters popular among cows?
They enjoy watching moovies.
Why are cats bad storytellers? Because they only have one tail.
What did the turkey say to the turkey hunter?
"Quack, quack."
Why can't college students take exams at the zoo?
Too many cheetahs!
How does a fish always know how much they weigh? -- Because they have their own scales.
What's the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? -- One is really heavy, and the other is a little lighter.
Where do rabbits eat breakfast?
IHOP.
Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? -- Because the octopus was well armed.
What do you call a cross between a gorilla and a monkey? -- A cross.
What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for college? -- "Bison."
Two horses are standing in a field. "I'm so hungry I could eat a horse," says the first.
"Moo!" says the second.
What did the fish say before he hit the wall? -- "Oh, dam."
How do you count cows? -- With a cowculator.
What is the difference between a cat and a complex sentence?
A cat has claws at the end of its paws. A complex sentence has a pause at the end of its clause.