Why do giraffes have such long necks?
Because their feet smell!
Why would you never donate to crabs?
Because they're shellfish!
Why did the Texas cow own its own dachshund?
The cowboy told it to "get along little doggie."
Press F to pay respects to Grumpy Cat!
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
What's a furry's favorite news network?
Fox!
Why didn't the koala make the finals? It got diskoalafied.
What do you get when you cross a cow with a fish?
A genetically unstable animal that is impossible and would die instantly upon existing. If it could live, it would be a deformed, parasitic tumor that undulates through people.
So, I was walking down the path of my life with Bigfoot, noticing the two pairs of footprints, mine and his.
One day, I notice his prints are gone. I look up to him and say, "You had promised you would always be there for me. How is this possible?"
He then looks me straight in the eyes and says, "Raw!"
What did the butcher say to the pig?
Nice to meat you.
Why is the bald eagle bald?
Because it has no hair.
It has feathers. LOL.
How do you stop a dog from humping your leg?
Pick him up and sick his dick.
Dumb.
What is the last thing that goes through a fly's head when it hits the windshield?
Its butt.
What animal lies? A lion.
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
A “Lickalottapuss”.
A chicken walks into a bar.
He orders Dr. Pepper.
He then lays a good scrambled egg.
What do dogs drink? Pupsi.
What soda do dogs drink? Pupsi.
What goes moo? Cow.
Share this with your friends!
Ok, so, a mole goes up to a snail and eats him.
It was a seven course meal if I say so myself.
