Animal jokes
Q: What do you call a cow stuck on a barb wire fence?
A: Udderly destroyed.
I went to the zoo but all I saw was a dog.
Yeah, it was a shih tzu!
I went to the zoo but all I saw was a dog.
Yeah, it was a shih tzu.
Why do four polish heteroflexable men like to suck on four of the cow's udders? Because a bull has only one.
I love me a nice tight pussy. That's why I'm in big trouble with RSPCA.
Why did the Nurse bring a red pen to work? To draw Blood.
Why did the M&M go to school? To be a smartie.
Why did the monkey bring a ladder to school? To be in highschool.
Why did the octopus 🐙 beat the shark in a fight?
Because he was well armed!
The worst thing about an owl is how they can maintain eye contact when you put them in a microwave.
Why did two dumb blondes put condoms on the cow's udders because they wanted the cow to practice safe sex?
Where did my rabbit go?
*crunch*
How can you make an Otter Pop become funny?
Take your shotgun and make an otter go "pop!"
What do you call a fish and a guitar?
Tunafish.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
IDK! WHY?
To go see yo mama!
What do you call an alligator detective??
An investi-gator.
What do you call finding half of a worm?
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh moan for me.
Me, smashes mouse after losing a match; everybody at the pet race: :O
I'd hit you, but I don't want to go to jail for animal abuse.
Q: What do you call a pigeon that is full of poop that flies in front of a car?
A: A suicide bomber.
Why do women have legs? Because they would leave snail tracks wherever they went.
Mufasa, proof that cats don't always land on their feet.