Ani jokes
Why couldn't the annoying dog get on Papyrus's nerves?
HE'S A SKELETON. HE DOESN'T HAVE ANY.
How is sex like air? It’s not a big deal unless you aren’t getting any.
What happens when you have dry elbows at work?
You don't have any elbow grease to put into it.
"How does dry skin affect you at work?""You don’t have any elbow grease to put into it."
Want to know how you make any salad into a Caesar salad?
Stab it twenty-three times.
Not a joke.
Any girls looking for a steamy hot man?
My priest asked if anyone had any questions or anything interesting they wanted to say.
So I raised my hand, he said why don’t you tell everyone what you have to say.
In front of the whole church I said I did not know Jesus Christ was the first scarecrow.
Why doesn't Mexico win any medals in the summer Olympics anymore?
Because all the Mexicans that can run, swim, or jump are already here.
I tried to make a pun about cheese, but I couldn't think of any good "whey" to do it.
I want a bigger couch.
Why? You're going to be in the kitchen most of the time anyway.
Why does an orphanage have milk?
Because Dad never came back with the milk.
An advantage of being an orphan: the teacher can't give you any homework.
I told my emo girlfriend, "Do you like the lights?" Oh wait, she ain't got any.
If I was any more inbred, I'd be a sandwich.
Why do they call them a nonce?
Because they go for people who don't have any sense.
Maybe the reason there isn't any physical evidence is because it didn't happen.
A: What do you call a sophisticated American? B: Canadian.
A: Why aren't there any Mexicans in Canada? B: They can't run that far.
«A: Что вы называете искушенным американцем? Б: Канадец.
A: Почему в Канаде нет ни одного мексиканца? Б: Они не могут убежать так далеко».
Do you want to know what gifts God gave me?
He didn't give me any.
I was made by the Devil.
Friend: Hi!
Me: Who are you?
Friend: ...your friend?
Me: What are you talking about? The doctor already said I couldn’t have any.
Sister: You're so stupid.
Me: Calling me stupid doesn't make you any smarter!