Air

Air jokes

Friend

An African man visits his friend in the US.

“I just flew in yesterday,” the African man says. “And boy are my arms tired!”

“You know, that’s kind of an old joke here in America,” replied his friend.

“Joke?” the African man said. “I’ve been holding my hands in the air yelling ‘don’t shoot’ ever since I got to this damn country!”

Mary Poppins

What happens to Mary Poppins when the wind dies down?

*Mary Poppins seen falling in background*

Emo

Who can jump the highest?

Emos, some of them are still in the air.

Orphan

Someone went up to an orphan and asked him why he was talking to the air. He said he was talking to his mom.

Memes

Hotel

My hotel tried to charge me ten dollars extra for air conditioning. That wasn’t cool.

Watermelon

Dude, if there is a watermelon, shouldn't there be an earthmelon, airmelon, and a firemelon? The elemelons.

Theme Song

Chris Rock: Jada, I can't wait to see you in G.I. Jane 2!

Fresh Prince of Bel-Air theme song starts playing:

Will: "I got in one lil' fight about my wife's lost hair, she said, 'Will, if you don't do something I'm gonna have an affair!'" 😂😂😂

Friend

My friend is gonna release an air strike. There has to be at least 20 confirmed toilet kills.

Place

Have you heard about the smart traveler? He's clearly going places.

Canoe

A man from France, a man from Britain, and a man from New York are on an expedition to the Amazon Forest. After a while, they get lost. As they are walking, suddenly the bushes jump up into the air, and men with spears are there.

One man says, "Hey, you're in our sacred land. So, what we are going to do is skin you and then use your flesh to make canoes. But we aren’t that crazy, so we will let you choose how you die."

The man from France said, "Bring me the poison."

The man from Britain said, "Bring me the gun."

And the man from New York said, "Bring me a fork."

The guy was confused with the fork but still brought the items and gave them to them. The guy from France said, “For France!” and drank the poison and died. The man from Britain said, “Long live the Queen!” and shot himself and died. And the man from New York started stabbing himself with the fork and said, “MAKE A CANOE OUT OF THIS YOU FUCKERS!”

Difference

What's the difference between an air blower and Little Boy?

When the air blower blew, it did not wipe out Hiroshima.

  • 0
  • Plane

    Me: Opens the window to get some fresh air.

    Everyone else on the plane: 😟...😱

    Dick

    Why is my dick like a balloon?

    The more you blow it, the bigger it gets.

    Name

    What do Will from "Stranger Things" and the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air have in common? They're both named Will, and their lives both got flipped, turned upside down.