Age

Age jokes

Johnny Depp

    • Johnny Depp once said in an interview: "I get older, my girlfriends stay the same age."

    Maybe Johnny Depp's soulmate isn't born yet. We'll see in 20-25 years.

  • 1

    • Pedophile

    • My girlfriend is 19 and I'm 29. We go out to eat in a restaurant, but the whole time I have to deal with being accused of being a pedo, being called disgusting and disturbed.

    It completely ruined our 10 year anniversary.

  • 19

    • Tense

    • An old teacher asked her student, "If I say, 'I am beautiful,' which tense is that?" The student replied, "It is obviously past."

  • 25

    • Incest

    • People keep telling me they hope Kenny never has kids.

    I don't think that's a worry. His mom is much too old to get pregnant.

  • 1
    • Age memes

    Mom

    • Your mom is so old, she walked into an antique store and they kept her.

    Your mom is so dumb, she called me asking for my phone #.

    Anniversary

    • I was out for dinner with my 19 year old girlfriend. I, being 42, had many people shouting at me, scolding me, calling me a creep. It really ruined our 10th anniversary.

  • 14

    • Beard

    • Why are Palestinian boys so eager to grow a beard?

    So they can use their mum's ID to get in the club.

  • 1

    • Black Hole

    • Stephen Hawking is better than NASA. They study black holes that are 8 billion years old, while he was down here on Earth staring at 14-year-old black holes. 😈😈😈

  • 4

    • Black Hole

    • Did you know there are black holes billions of years old?

    What’s more amazing is the black holes Stephen Hawking studied. We're only 14 years old.

  • 1

    • Child

    • Old woman: You are such a darling child. Please come and see me again next year.

    A year later, as child walks up to the door of the old lady's house...

    Old woman: Oh my! Goodness sakes, child! Have you grown, or have I shrank???

    Child: Both.

  • 4