Age jokes
"Officer, don’t arrest me, she said she was 5 in dog years!"
Me when people ask how old my girlfriends are:
"There's 2, there're 4, there're 6, there're 8."
Three boys are in the 4th grade; one is black, one is white, and the other is Hispanic. Who has the biggest penis?
The black one... he's 13!
Yo mama so old, when she left the antique shop, the alarm went off.
Yo mom's so old, she went into the museum and walked out with a raise.
I came across a pic of the oldest man on earth on IG. He was 132 years old.
I commented "age is just a number" for him; now I'm banned.
Bro, is your hairline and your forehead good friends because they go way back?
Your hairline and my grandpa go way back.
You look too old to be living with your grandma.
Yo hairline is so far back that it was there before the Big Bang happened.
Your hairline is so far back that even my dad wasn't fetching the milk back then.
What age is served for breakfast?
"Ring Ring! Hi, I've been needing to call you. Your hairline has been found by Dora after 25 years!"
Your hairline is so far back that it killed the dinosaurs.
Your hairline goes so far back that Crown Burger was Crown Sandwiches.
What do a 100-year-old pornstar and The White Stripes have in common? Icky Thump!
Organise my brother's bucks party and got confused when he asked for a hot 22 year old for I brought him 20 two yr Olds....
Good thing my brother's a little bit different.
Your mom is so old that her birth certificate says "expired."
How old do you have to be to drink? Any age.
Why would the chicken not cross the road?
Because it's too old. (The joke is old.) (The chicken is old.)