what is tall when it's young but short when it's old?
a candle or a pencil!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
In this modern age, I feel as though it's inappropriate to make jokes about herbs and fish. It's not the thyme or the plaice for it.
1 2 3 4 5. I'm old enough to drive, for now I'm still alive, till I crash in that beehive!
TFW you're having sex with your german girlfriend and she won't stop telling you here age
I did so much research that I got BONE-tired from doing this TIBIA honest. You probably didn’t find that HUMERUS. I got a SKELETON of these puns. I guess i could learn a FEMUR puns. I was wondering if the the creators of this site could TALUS how they come up with puns or maybe give some advice? I'm only 14 years-old.
Captain America is a 106 yo virgin
When I was 8, my sister was half my age. I am 60 now, how old is my sister?
Comments: 30! Give me an easier question next time!
me on my way to the prinsiples office after the trans kid told me to act my age so i told him to act his gender
What do you call a 96-year-old who can still masturbate?
miracle whip
"I told my mom I thought parenting got easier as the kids get older and she laughed so hard she cried a little."
In a deep village in Germany old man asked his granddaughter "what are you doing?". His granddaughter replies "removing polish with chemicals". Grandpa said when I was younI did the same.
Why couldn’t the underaged orphan get on an adult only website. Because you need your parents consent.
Why cant an or phan get a tatoe at a young age. They dont have parent premison
What’s the difference between a microwave and a 10 year old girl? The microwave doesn’t fart out blood and diarrhoea when you pull your meat out
What do you call a girl above age 16 who says she is a virgin? A liar.
When you turn 100 you get a letter from the Queen, when you turn 16 you get a DM from prince Andrew.
Im 43 and my date is 19. A man rudely comes up to our table and calls me a pedofile. I told him to fuck off this is our 10th anniversary
I always feel better when my doctor says something is normal for my age but then think dying will also be normal for my age at some point.
He: I am 60 and I have to slog 12 hours a day to make a living. Do u call it life?
She: I am 28 and still a virgin, do u call it life?
An old woman goes to the doctor complaining of extremely smelly gas. "I don't understand it, Doc", she said, "I have this terrible, terrible gas". "Thankfully", she added, "they are at least silent when I fart". Doctor hands her a bottle of pills, tells her take them all and then come back to see him. The old woman returned a short time later extremely mad. "I took those pills like you said and not only is my gas smelly, but now when I fart they are obnoxiously loud!", she yelled. The doctor said, "well, now that we've solved your hearing problem, let's see what we can do about that gas".
