When I masturbate, things cum.
When an old man does, no one cums.
Age Jokes
A 98 year old man goes to bed on a one layer bed. He wakes up under it...
My friend: "Ya mama so stupid, she sits on the TV and watches the couch!"
Me: "That joke's older than your mom!"
Have you ever wondered how your teachers would look if they were 20 years younger than they actually are? I bet some of them would be smoking hot. Especially my 25-year-old English teacher. I'd bang her if she were 20 years younger.
Your mama is so old that she forgot her donkey on Noah's Ark.
I like my girls how I like my wine, 12 years locked in the basement.
Yo mama so old, she was in third grade with Moses.
What store has the most vegetables?
A nursing home.
What's the difference between a 14-year-old boy and an 8-year-old boy?
The 14-year-old is on top, the 8-year-old is on the bottom.
What does a 90 year old's pussy taste like?
Depends...
Have you ever been eight before?
You were between 7 and 9.
What did the pedophile say to the nutcracker?
"Aren't you a little too young to be doing that?"
Yo mama so fat and old, she lifted her boob to wash under it, and a pilgrim fell from under it.
My girlfriend keeps calling me a pedophile. That's a big word for a seven year old.
Girls are like math; if they're under ten, then you use your fingers.
Max likes his girls like he likes his wine. 7 years old and locked in his basement.
Little girls are like basic math. If they're under 13, you do them in your head.
What do McDonald's and a priest have in common? They both put their meat in 10 year old buns.
My friend told me he had a sister. I asked if she was hot, and he said she was 8. That wasn't my question.
A pedophile is chatting on the internet: "On a scale of one to ten, how old are you?"
