Age jokes
I like my women like I like my wine: 12 years in a basement.
What do you call Trump with no spray tan on his hair?
Your next door grumpy old neighbor.
*bowl of dark grapes*
Friend 1: I like my grapes how I like my men.
Friend 2: Black? Good one.
Friend 1: 21 at a time.
A father of a young girl comes to meet the doctor.
Father: Doctor, how is my daughter's report?
Doctor: Congrats, your daughter is pregnant.
Father: WTF ?????? My daughter is 10 years old and unmarried!
A father of a young girl comes and meets the doctor.
Father: Doctor, how is my daughter's report?
Doctor: Congrats, your daughter is pregnant.
Father: WTF ?????? My daughter is 10 years old and unmarried.
What’s the best thing about fucking twenty-eight year olds?
There’s twenty of them!
A man is standing on the side of the road, waiting to cross, when another man stands alongside him. The first man says, "I have been waiting to cross here for ages. It's impossible to cross."
The second man says, "There is a zebra crossing up the road." He said, "I hope he is having better luck than I am!"
"Let girls live" is 9 years old, OMG, right?
I like my women like I like my wine.
Twelve years old and tied up in my basement.
Do you wanna know the best thing about 28 year olds?
There are 20 8 year olds.
What's the same about dark humor and kids with cancer?
They never get old.
I like my girls like I like my wine.
12 years old and locked in my basement.
At weddings, old people tell kids, "You're next!"
At funerals, little kids tell old people, "You're next!"
What did Hitler get for his 6th birthday?
A Kewpie burger and an Easy-Bake Oven.
Shaenaya is single, 16, and looking for a 30 year old man that can pleasure her, huh?
I like my cigars like I like my women: 7 years old and in a burlap sack from Cuba.
Ok, not really racist but still funny.
My grandpa has a world record for holding his breath. He's been holding it for 6 years.
How can you tell the difference between a Christian priest and a zit?
One waits until you're twelve to come on your face.
I like my woman like I like my wine, 12 years old and locked in the basement.
God: Ok, so I created adults. And I created how they are supposed to look from being born to preteen.
Satan: (slides in) I’ll take over for you, pops.
God: I dunno... this is very delicate work. Just one wrong thing can ruin the system.
Satan: Don’t worry your beard off! (Pats his back) I’ll just do the ages from 12 to 18!
God: Hmm... I’m still not- (Gets a call on his phone) Shoot, I got to take this. (Answers call) Don’t touch anything, Lucifer! (Walks away)
Satan:.......(just touches lightly, and alarms start blaring. He squeaks and runs away)
God: (rushes in) WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO?!?!
God: (tries fixing problems. Only gets alarms off) Fuck me........
God:....(sighs) Fine, it’ll stay. We’ll just call it....puberty.