Aed jokes
When a "Baby on Board" sticker is a little faded and beat up, you know the kid is at least a year old, and the car is safe to ram.
What's a kidnapper's favorite shoe? White vans.
A Roman walks into a bar and asks for a Martinus.
"Don't you mean a martini?" asks the bartender.
The Roman replies, "If I wanted a double, I would have asked for one!"
What do you call a 5th grader with no friends?
Sandy Hook survivor.
When I was a kid, my father would tell me that the black Santa Claus was coming to our house for Christmas. So, instead of putting out cookies and milk, we would put out cornbread and purple Kool-Aid.
It’s not a meme, it’s just my sister
Bill Clinton, George W. Bush, and George Washington are on a sinking ship.
As the boat sinks, George Washington heroically shouts: “Save the women!”
George W. Bush hysterically hollers: “Screw the women!”
Bill Clinton asks excitedly: “Do we have time?”
A woman's age is harder to get than the President's phone number.
It's easy to tell if a skeleton is lying to you because you can see right through them.
What do you call a guy who loves to eat out a hoe's pussy?
Answer: a Carnivwhore.
Bill Clinton and Joe Biden are on a sinking ship.
Joe Biden says we need to save the women and children. Bill Clinton says, "Screw the women and children." Joe Biden says, "Do we have that much time?"
What’s the difference between a cancer patient and a British news reporter in the South?
They usually don’t live to tell the tale.
If a pregnant lady murders someone, does the child get an assist?
What is the difference between Bill Cosby and a rap artist?
The word "art."
There used to be Wonder Woman.
Now we wonder, what is a woman?
If a tree could be any animal, what would it be?
Answer: A dog because of its bark lol. 😀
What is a terrorist's first move in chess?
C4.
"A friend with weed is a friend indeed."
How long does it take a black woman to take out the trash?
About nine months and a day.
How do blind people know when to stop wiping?
With a taste test.
The fact I couldn't hear the announcements at my school because the boys in my advisory are clapping with no hands should be a joke just in itself. They were making sexual faces as well, oh, and don't forget the moaning they do.