Aed jokes
Q: What do you get when the cow jumped over the barbed wire? A: Udder destruction!
A wife and husband go to a barn. The husband picks up a goat and says, “Look at this pig I have to sleep with every night.”
The wife says, “Honey, that’s a goat.”
The husband replies with, “I was talking to the goat.”
Bully 1 to Bully 2: You're ugly.
Bully 2: Look in a mirror.
Bully 1: Just because it worked for you doesn't mean it will work for everyone else.
Why is no one friends with Dracula? Because he's a pain in the neck.
Q: Why does Pewdiepie prefer knives over guns?
A: Because knives don't have barrels.
experiment
Wife: “I want another baby.”
Husband: “That’s a relief, I also really don’t like this one!”
Pokemon: What do you call a killer that uses psycho powers?
Mr. Mime!
I can't believe what just happened. I was at the bowling alley having a great time with my girlfriend when suddenly a man took all of our bowling pins! I asked him why and he said he needed more tapins to keep his career relevant. I instantly realized it was Penaldo!
The Twin Towers were like a woman stuck in the washer machine. They both got freed.
Why do shows have a family? Because they are "Pair-rents"!
For someone to be stealing a bag of gold in Heaven, [they are] a criminal on Earth and [in] Heaven.
Q: How can you tell if a Western is gay?
A: All the good guys are hung.
How much wood can a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? If you woodchuck on the world with that, you have a really deep in, and he says goodbye. When he says goodbye, you're like, "if you."
When you are sitting outside at school and this boy comes up to you with a rock in his hand and says, "Do you know where Mrs. Stewart is at?"
Little Mickel was on a tree.
He fell down and hurt his knee.
He sat down and started to cry, and from there, he would never lie.
What do you call a very rude bird? A mockingbird.
A: Knock knock.
B: Who's there?
A: Package from Ted Kaczynski.
B: Package from Te-?
A: BOOM!
Why is the queen in chess the most powerful piece? Because the board looks like a kitchen floor.
I wrote a joke on MH370... but I don’t know where it went.
Spare.
You got a spare, spare me an inch of that far juicy cock.