Aed jokes
How do you get a blonde to drown? You tell them the bottom of the pool smells weird.
What hairstyle do horses like best while reading a story?
Pony-tails.
I'd tell you a joke about my boyfriend's dick, but it's a private joke.
How do you spot a cow?
With a bingo dabber.
You’re so short you would need a lift to kiss your bride.
What fruit is square and green? A lemon in disguise.
My friend nearly drowned in her bowl of muesli the other day. She was pulled in by a strong "currant."
What do you call a giraffe giving a blow job to another giraffe?
Getting neck!
Why are bees' hair always sticky?
Because they use a honeycomb...
I think about my life, and then I think about death. I prefer death. If you ask me, life is just a time when you die. Basically, death is life, meaningless 0-0.
Me: I need a good roast.
My friend: Take me!
Aw hell naw,
dey turned Spongilebile in2 a frigin generator.
I am an orphan...
I was in Afghanistan and I had been captured by the Taliban. I was going to get the death penalty.
Suddenly a man came out of nowhere and offered to take the penalty. It was my idolo Penaldo. He missed the penalty. Now I will die. Shame on u Penaldo!
Teacher said, "You never do your homework," so I shot her 7 times with a M1 BushDid911 and replied, "It's all in my backpack, can you grade it please?"
Dulux have created a new type of paint. It's called "Sue Grey." It covers up everything.
I wish I knew life, but my dad said it was a mistake to begin with.
What makes laissez-faire and a gangbang the same?
Not my problem.
Why does the singer put a radio in her fridge?
Because she can listen to call music.
Q: What did the ocean say to the boy?
A: Nothing! Oceans don't talk, silly!