Aed jokes
What does an eighty-year-old woman have in between her boobs that a twenty-year-old woman doesn't?
A belly button.
Why can’t orphans play catch?
They never had a dad to teach them.
"Uh daddy harder," the orphan said. Oh wait, he doesn’t have a daddy.
What do you call people who jumped in the dam?
A dam fool.
I have double standards: burn a body at a crematorium and you're being a respectful friend; do it at home and you're destroying evidence.
What's the difference between a dead baby in my trash can and a discarded sex toy?
...
I'm still trying to think of an answer.
"Dad, what is 69?" asks son.
Dad: "Well son, it is a position where a man and women pleasure each other orally."
Son: "So what shall I write? Odd or even?"
How do you get your appeal for rape charges accepted? Say you were expressing your desire for a woman, which is protected under the Constitution in freedom of expression.
What do you call a white kid at the back of class?
A school shooter.
What do a bungee jump and a hooker have in common?
They’re both cheap, fast, and if the rubber breaks, you’re pretty much screwed.
Why can’t a gay person walk a trail? Because a gay person can’t walk on a straight line.
If they made a movie about your sex life, what would it be?
In Afghanistan, it would be "Twelve Years a Slave!" 🤣
How do you know when Kobe Bryant is famous?
His face was chiseled in a mountain.
A girl walks in the room. She asks her mom, "Why's my name Flower?" Her mom said, "When you were born, a flower fell on your head." Brick walks in the room. Jasvidnqzkdvsosbd.
I told a blonde she needed gas for her car, and she farted into the gas tank.
Q: How do you know there’s a party at Neverland Ranch? A: All the Big Wheels are parked out front.
Q: When do you know it’s over? A: Only one is left.
Your hairline is so far back it became a case.
A kid goes to bed with his dad because he’s scared of the dark. Turns out he just wanted to have sex.
Don't be sad if you miss a shot when you yell "Kobe." He didn't make it either.
What's something similar between a clogged pipe and a pregnant woman?
You fix both with a coat hanger.