Aed jokes

Two Trojan warriors were patrolling the streets of Troy at night. It was finally time for their duties to be relieved. When they went back to their houses, one Trojan fell in a puddle. "Nitrogen!" The other called. And the other responded coldly, “Good night.”

Remember, the confession booth is not a glory hole.

How do you get a depressed girl to suck your dick?

Pour bleach on it.

When a kindergarten teacher asks a kid to sing the alphabet, he said "ab3defg." The teacher said, "Do you like 3D?" He said, "Yeah." The teacher yelled, "Okay, do you have a 3DS?" He said yes. The teacher goes into his bag and says, "Say ABCs or your 3DS will be destroyed." He says, "ab3defghijlmnopqrs." "Oh, he learned well." The teacher threw the 3DS out the window. The kid gets it, and it still works. Then he googles ABCs. It goes to YouTube and says, "abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz." The teacher is proud of the 3DS. The class went home telling parents.

I lost my job making storage units for the police after a week. I guess you could say it was a brief case.

Orphans and punching bags are almost the same.

They both get hit, but a punching bag is still wanted.

What do you call a donkey and a potato?

Assround

What’s the difference between a crossdresser and a trans person?

About 3 years.

Why is a cabbage green? Because it's in Greenland.

How to give a good hand job?

Bop it. Pull it. Twist it. Harder. Better. Faster. Stronger. You put your left hand in. You put your left hand out. You put your left hand in and shake it all about.

None of you ever touch my penis.

I had a friend who got shot in the head.

Guess you could say he was...

Blown Away!

I tried to eat ass once. The donkeys got one hell of a kick!

Dentist said I grind in my sleep... he a real one for that.

Charlie Chaplin and Tork Poettschke meet.

Chaplin: "What can I do for you?"

Poettschke: "Please get away from me."

You're more likely to be killed by a cow than by a shark.

Dude: Hey dude guess who I am?

Viewers: Dora.

Trump: No, I am President Trump.

Viewers: Why are you wearing Dora’s clothes and backpack?

Trump: Today we are going to build a wall.

Viewers: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

He's a Fortnite kid, haha!

What do you call a droid that takes the long way around?

R2 Detour.

Yo mama so dumb, when the doctor told her she had coronavirus, she bought a new laptop.

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