Aed jokes
A hot woman called "Jessie" was showering when the phone rang.
Jessie was upset because the phone wouldn't stop ringing, and she goes out naked from the bathroom to answer the phone in the hall.
Jessie on the phone: 《Hello? 》
The one on the phone: 《Oh hi, I'm Jeff, I just wanted to tell you don't go out from your bathroom naked next time because my brother is behind you right now trying to rape you.》
Jessie: 《Stop it my sister! This is the 10th time you do this cringe joke! It gets boring!》
But sadly it wasn't a joke, and she cried a lot that night and learned how not to go out naked from the bathroom again.
Q. What do you call a CEO that's been shot in the head?
A. An ambulance.
What happened to the woman who dated a rapist?
She was date raped.
I recently learned that churches won’t let trans men become priests because they don’t consider trans men as men, which is rather confusing to me.
As a Jew, I don’t know very much about Christianity, but from what I’ve heard, don’t priests love little boys?
What's an emo's favorite game? Fruit Ninja.
roblocks
A good man deserves a queen who will pussy slide on his penis casually, frig him with her thighs like a prostitute, make him laugh like a homie, cook like his mama.
Why did the priest want to learn how to play the organ?
He wanted to be able to finger A minor.
A woman walks into a bar and says, "Ow!"
Yo mama so stupid, she told the police a kid raped her.
Why don't you see gay people in wheelchairs?
Because once you're a fruit, you can't be a vegetable.
What happened when the 400+ women ate a slice of cake?
She died the next weekend.
I have a brother and he told me this quote, "No wonder they had a second child, they messed up on the first one." He’s the second child... I’m the first...
What do women and moldy bread have in common?
A yeast infection.
I was in a toxic relationship. After some time, my girlfriend died. Her name was Happy. Still got no clue of her body, and here I am lying on the bed so fucking happy.
My blind friend got ran over by a parked car.
Chuck Norris gets paid $2 million a month training Bear Grylls how to survive in the “harshest conditions on earth.”
A man enters the bank and says, "Hi, I'm robbing you!" The man was arrested instantly.
On the 12th day of Christmas Peo Pessi gave to me:
12 tap ins
11 pointless dribbles
10 fixed league titles
9 missed penalties
8-2
6 dives
500 million robbed from Barca
4 UCL semi losses
3 times he blamed Higuain
2 retirements
And a transfer to a farmers league.
Why do white people colonize everything?
To steal a culture for themselves, something other than fornicating with anything that moves including their own children and pets, which they already do.
What do you get when you cross an alligator with a vest?
An investigator.