Aed jokes
What do you get when you cross an alligator with a vest?
An investigator.
If you're bored, pull a Technoblade, bully orphans.
What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
Hello everyone, have a great day and be positive!
Jack and Jill went up a hill so Jill could lick Jack's candystick, but Jill got a surprise when she saw her boyfriend Rik. He got so angry Jack has no candystick no more. Jill went home with a black eye, and Rik got arrested for cutting Jack's candystick.
If you tell me to get a life, you're telling me to get a life better than yours!
Why does a very tall man allow dwarfs to take turns to suck his balls?
Because he is nuts about them!
What do you call a guy on fire in a wheelchair?
Hot wheels.
J0K35 (me): So I heard China recently released a snack.
Guy: Oh, what is it?
J0K35: They call it the Asian Raisin.
Guy: Isn't that what RiceGum was when he released Frick da police?
A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter, so now I am dead!" Haha, it is funny because the squirrel gets dead.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
He tried to download a free version of Windows.
Hey, can you hold this for a second?
One day, a skeleton wasn't laughing. Someone asked him why he was not laughing. It turns out he fell and broke his bone, his funny bone that is.
Healthcare these days is a bit of an Obamanation.
Charizarding.
When you light a girl's pubes on fire, put it out with your jizz, then flap your arms and say, "You don't have enough badges to train me!"
How do you know when a cabbage is boiled?
The wheelchair floats to the top.
What did the cow say to the cheese? I am your father.
What do you call a cow that's laying down? Ground Beef.
What did my grandpa say after he kicked the bucket?
Nothing, I unplugged his life support before he said a word.
Why doesn't Batman need Robin as a wingman?
Because he has no problem robbin' your girl.
"Bitch, I’m a cow, bitchhhhh."
What kind of tree fits into your hand? A palm tree.