Aed jokes

I'm Alya. I'm a dumb whore who ruins people's fun on this sight made for jokes with categories for orphan jokes, but I like ruining people's fun.

So, my kid took my car. He crashed it off a bridge. I miss it, but it's going to have my car.

Why can't Michael Jackson play baseball?

He made a hit and run!

I saw a little kid crying today. I asked where his parents were, and he started to cry more. I left the orphanage to get some milk after that.

This ole boy picked up a hooker one time and she gave him the clap. In a few days, he saw her again, and he went up to her and said, "Hey, you gave me the clap!" She said, "NO I DID NOT! I sold it to ya!"

Why did the baker's hands smell of shit?

He kneaded a turd.

What do you call California when it’s having a wildfire? Completely normal.

You know orphans are kinda like a house with no people in it.

Because it’s empty inside.

Who were the people that survived 9/11?

The ones who decided it would be a good idea to jump.

I have a joke about lazy people!

Actually... forget it... it won't work.

Meat stands for: M - monitoring, E - evaluating, A - assessing/addressing, T - treatment.

So when you're shoving meat up people's asses, then you're monitoring them, evaluating them, assessing them, and treating them.

I remember asking my mum: "What's a couple?"

She replied, "Two or three."

Which probably explains her collapsed marriage.

I made a website for orphans, unfortunately it doesn’t have a homepage.

Dear Gwen and Prince,

Gwen and Prince, sorry for being mean and cussing and other messed up nonsense. To be honest, I really just wanted to be your friends, all both of you! BTW Prince, Gwen is not dating Aiden...I don't even know who Aiden is! Sorry a million times, Zreina.

Why does an orphan only have a Samsung? Because it doesn't have a home button!

You're the type of guy to have a whole training arc after a girl wants to fight you.

When you think of the word "simp," you think of a girl. "Girl" stands for ghosts in real life. Another word for simp is "ding dong." Put them together, and you get ghosts in real life with ding dongs.

My grandfather has been through a lot in his time. When he was in the war, he survived a mustard gas attack. And later down the line, he survived being pepper sprayed by the police. He was certainly a real seasoned veteran.

The Blonde got a Ph.D.?

Yeah, like that would ever happen.

Why was the duck fired from the train station?

He was a bad conducktor!