Aed jokes

I was anonymous with the previous jokes. I will now go by "I can fly! *falls*."

What's black and white and red all over? A mime I hit with my car.

Q: Why did the cow touch an electric fence?

A: Because it wanted to get electrocowted! 🐄

My girl asked me if I had seen a gorilla anywhere. I told her yes, I did see one a minute ago at the Central Park Zoo. He said if you don't behave, he will take you back to the jungle and have your ass abandoned for good.

What did the cell phone say to his wife?

"I will give you a ring."

When the school shooter gives the autistic kid a glock and he shoots himself, thinking it’s a cigarette.

What do you call a dick playing badminton?

A shuttlecock.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall?

Depends on how hard you throw them.

Sometimes I just want to toss a flash bang into a room full of epileptic kids.

I saw a sign that said, "Falling Rocks." I tried it, and it doesn't.

I told my mum that a few guys tell me that you're a MILF.

My mom said what that is. I reply, "Mom, I'd Like To Fuck." My mum started out to laugh, then she told me, "Well, now you need a new stepdad."

Is Will Smith a blacksmith?

Q: What did the man say after removing another man's hat? A: He was decapitated.

So, my friend's birthday is in a couple of days, and I was wondering what to get him.

He hangs out at my house a lot, so I suggested adoption papers.

Yo' mama is a joke.

Archer riddle has less atoms in his brain than he does in his dick, and his dick is 1/4 of a millimeter.

I'm a nonbinary trash can.

What’s the difference between being a genius and being an idiot?

Being a genius has its limits.

My friend died by a truck, why can't I get run over?

I was taking a walk near the prison when I saw a good looking guy climbing down the fence, and when he noticed me, he gave me a sneer! It was pretty condescending.

How does a mathematician get tan?

sin/cos.