Aed jokes
If I had a genie grant me wishes, I wouldn't wish for a million pounds. I'd just wish that every time I buy something I just have the right amount of money in my pocket at the time.
I am the ice cream man running over fat kids with my van. If you touch my van, I’ll smack you in the face with a frying pan. If you steal ice cream, I’ll shoot you in the face with a fudge machine.
What would a man say to flirt with a woman that has a big butt?
You are so butty-ful!
One day a rooster fell into a swimming pool and a cat laughed. And the moral of the story? A wet cock can always satisfy a pussy.
Your dick is so small they thought you were a girl when you came into the world.
Life is like a game of chess.
I don’t know how to play chess.
If an orange is called an orange, why isn’t a lemon called a yellow?
If I ever ran for public office, I'd make Rajan a call center employee again.
Titanic didn't sink by an iceberg.
Titanic sank by 100000000000000000000000 Titanics.
Why is an orphan gay? Because they can call somebody "daddy."
Little Johnny got a dog without ears, and then they invited their neighbors over. Then they asked what his name was. The owners said, "We didn't name him anything, because there's no reason. Because when we called his name, he wouldn't come."
I have a friend who recently stopped smoking, and the withdrawal was causing hallucination. He went to my house and thought there was a shark in the pond in my backyard. So, I would like to dedicate these lyrics to my friend: "I see a dreamer over there by the water!"
If someone has a gun and tries to shoot you, just say, “Hipity hoppity, that gun is my property.”
If you unironically think someone who killed themselves should have their body in jail, you are honestly such a fucking embarrassment to humanity.
Yo mama so fat she can't walk for five seconds without sweating, causing a tsunami!
When the school shooter is getting roasted because of his Pokemon lunch box, but they don't know that there is a Glock 34 inside.
What’s the difference between an orphan and a sugar donut?
People want donuts.
What is the country that is always in a rush? Russia.
Today sucked. My friend fell off a cliff, and I went to jail.
What does a woman call Stormzy in bed?
Stiff chocolate.