Aed

Aed jokes

Santa

  • You know why Santa's saying is "Ho Ho Ho?"

    How else is he supposed to give boys and girls a baby brother or sister for Christmas?

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  • Daughter

  • One morning a dad was sitting and watching TV.

    His daughter comes in and says, "Dad! Why is my name Rose?" He replied, "Oh! It's because when you were born, a rose petal fell on your head." "Cool," Rose said.

    The second daughter walked in and said, "Dad! Why is my name Daisy?" He replied, "Oh! It's because when you were a baby, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Awesome," Daisy said.

    The third daughter came in and said, "DuUuUDeEeEeDrrrrrrrrr!!!" "SHUT UP, CINDER BLOCK!!!"

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  • Dick

  • What's the difference between Monday and a dick?

    They're not different. They're both unnecessarily long and hard.

    Rape

  • If raping someone is sexual harassment, then is raping a rapist inverted harassment?

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  • Chess

  • In British chess I guess they play without a queen...

    But in American chess they play without 2 towers.

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  • Ball

  • Don't tell me I haven't got balls. I just happen to wear mine on my chest, and I can guarantee they're a lot bigger than yours!

    9/11

  • My teacher asked me what my favorite number was yesterday, and I said 2977. I chose 91 for my football jersey number and Sharpied a 1 after the other 1, and my teacher Mr. Jackson's dad died in 9/11, and when he was talking about it Friday the 9th, I threw a paper airplane at him and got suspended for 3 days starting Monday.

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  • Birthday

  • I have a friend whose birthday is on September 11th.

    They're going to have an explosive party that will definitely blow you away!

    It's gonna be the bomb, and a blast, too!

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