Aed jokes
When was the only time you could see people base jump without a parachute?
2001/9/11.
Genders are like the twin towers. There used to be two of them, and now it’s a sensitive subject.
What does a husband of a woman do when he is horny?
He goes on a business trip with 100 $1 dollar bills.
Why did Timmy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.
Why did Princess Diana cross the road?
'Cause she didn't wear a seatbelt.
Mortar is like a woman's fanny; the more you play with it, the wetter it gets.
My tutor just said this quote of 2k18^^^
Pontypool is rough.
Why does Doctor Pepper come in a bottle?
His wife died.
How did Peter Parker get caught as Spider-Man?
Well, he weaved a really tangled web, and Aunt May saw it.
One time I saw a manatee all spray painted to look like a tiger. Needless to say, the first thing I yelled was, "OH! THE HUMANATEE!"
A depressed man was caught on top of the Empire State Building with marijuana. Needless to say, he didn't want to come down.
"Wanna hear a joke?"
"Sure."
"You SURE will be glad when this dad joke's over."
"That was pretty DAD!"
Did you hear about the two burglars that stole a calendar?
I hear they got six months each.
If you steal a lottery ticket, is it considered Grand Theft Lotto?
Sir, I mustache you a question...
Ah, never mind, I'll just shave it for later.
I was talking to my friends and they said a random topic about cats, and I'm like, "Water you talking about?" =3
How many people does it take to change a lightbulb underwater? The results are shocking!
I would try to make a Fortnite joke, but I can't seem to build on it.
What happens when a cow jumps over a wire fence?
Udder destruction.
What do you call a baby with red curry fried hair?
A baby using a potato peeler and a comb.
what do you call a bunch of retarded kids in a hot tub?
steamed vegetables.