Abortion Jokes

Girl: How do you feel about abortion? Dad: Ask your sister Girl: I don't have a ...

I just finished my fourth round of baby back ribs. For some reason, everyone else at the abortion center is staring at me

I'm not saying I hate you. I'm just saying that if I could go back in time I'd give your mom a coat hanger.

When your girlfriend has an abortion, it's kinda like dodging your own bullets.

I was going to tell a joke about babys but i decided to abort

You wanna know how to get rid of potential scam callers?

Next time you get a call from them just answer the phone and say "Pizza Hut abortion clinic where yesterday's loss is today's sauce, how may I help you?"

Abortion clinics are kind of like NAZI gas chambers. Less people come out than go in.

Papa John's pizzeria and abortion clinic, You make 'em we bake 'em

What does a freshly pregnant teen and her baby share?

They both think "Mom's probably going to kill me"

Welcome to arbys, where your babies become our gravy!

So I was fucking my daughter the other day and my wife walked in... I don't know what was funnier the look on her face or that the abortion clinic let me keep her

What's red, small, wet and crawls up your leg? - A homesick abortion

abortions = yeetis of the fetus

What do you call a woman who aborted her quadruplets? A graveyard

(I want to apologize in advance. These are very dark jokes) 1. What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

2. I was going to tell a dead baby joke. But I decided to abort.

3. Why does Dr. Pepper come in a bottle? His wife is dead.

4.Why does Helen Keller hate porcupines? They're painful to look at.

5. Why can't orphans play baseball? They don't know where home is.

6. Give a man a match, and he'll be warm for a few hours. Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

7. I asked a pretty, young homeless woman if I could take her home. She smiled at me and said yes. The look on her face soon changed, however, when I walked off with her cardboard box.

8. My wife and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children. If anybody does, please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.

When a woman decides to abort it is called a decision but when I run my truck into a playground of kids it is called murder

How come when women decide to kill their unborn baby its a "choice". But when I decide to drive my car into a playground full of children its called "murder".

I have a better method of abortion than currently used. It's like a regular one, except you can get free food out of it...we're about to give baby-back ribs a whole new meaning.