Worst Jokes Ever
Patient: "I'm starting to forget things."
Doctor: "Since when have you had this condition?"
Patient: "What condition?"
I asked my uncle why he was living on the streets.
He said that he wasn't always on the streets, he used to have a job at these two towers. I asked him what happened, and he said two planes happened.
"Hippoty hoppity, women are property."
This page is shocking.
What's wrong with you people?
You gotta hand it to blind prostitutes.
Rules of Dark humor:
1. All subject matter can be used, nothing is off limits.
2. No saying "Me" or "My Life" as a joke. Nobody finds those funny. We want actual good and meaningful jokes.
3. Don't Repeat Previously Posted Jokes. If you are saying the same joke that the person right before you posted you are just begging for attention and nobody by any means likes that.
I will add more in the future and be frequent on this site.
- Sincerely, Zane
A child asks his teacher to go to the toilet.
"Before you go, recite the alphabet," the teacher says.
"a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z"
"Good, but where's the p?"
"Running down my leg."
Why did the little girl's ice cream melt?
She was on fire.
What can you say both at a funeral and during sex?
This would be much better if you were alive.
Crucifixion was the first T-pose.
That awkward moment when you're checking yourself out in the window of a car and you realize there's somebody inside.
Do you know Imagine Dragons?
Yeah.
Imagine dragon my nuts across your face.
Where is the worst place to lock your keys in your car?
The anti-abortion clinic because you have to go back in and ask for a coat hanger.
Kids in the backseat make accidents, and accidents in the back seat make kids.
Fortnite is like America... At one time it was good and free. Now it's neither.
Necrophilia in Alabama is fun for the whole family, even grandma.
A mosquito with a Mario hat on flies on you saying, "It's-a me, Malario!"
Why did the zookeeper lose his job? For choking the chicken and spanking the monkey!
What do you take care of after a car crash?
The witnesses.
Little Jonny walks in on his parents having sex. He asks what they're doing and the father says: "Well...we're making you a brother." So little Jonny runs off to let his parents finish, happy that he's going to have a brother soon.
The next day when little Jonny's father comes home, Jonny is crying out on the driveway. The father sits down next to Jonny and asks what's wrong. Jonny cries: "I won't have a baby brother!" His father is confused. "What do you mean?" he asks. "Because the mailman came by today and ate him!"