Worst Jokes Ever
What's the difference between a duck?
One of its legs are both the same!
What kinds of apples grow on trees?
All of them.
Why did the astronaut break up with his girlfriend? - Because he needed some space.
What did the house painter ask when he went to the abortion clinic?
"Where do you keep the cans of paint?"
What's 2 + 2? A: 22.
Dead people can’t cross the street because they're dead, ha ha!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Iceberg lettuce. Iceberg lettuce who? Iceberg! Let us in!
How did a man kill his car? He throttled it.
Don't break someone's heart because they only have one; instead, break their bones... they have 206.
What's the best part of not wearing a condom when I'm with my girlfriend? My mom went through menopause.
Why couldn't the chicken cross the road?
Because it was disabled.
Confucius say, "Man who sit in church and fart must sit in pew."
If you humped a whale, it would humpback.
"Florida was ranked the worst state in the 50 states by Thriller."
Florida: Well, WE didn't want to give our oranges anyway!
What’s the most common name for cancer patients?
Luke (leukemia)
What do you call a communist?
Braxton.
How do you finger a feminist? Shake her hand and call her Theresa.
You never told me you were part orangutan. Have you considered taking a vacation to Planet of the Apes?
Did you hear about the guy who made knock-knock jokes? He won the Nobel Prize.
What does a house wear?
A dress.