Worst Jokes Ever
Where does an orphan come from?
Daddy getting milk.
How to get your joke on every category? Michael Jackson, towers, morbid, emo, school, short, penis, sects, little Jonny.
My wife told me to pass her lip stick, but I gave her a glue stick. Now she is not talking to me.
I'm not looking for consent, I'm looking for cooperation!
What does an abortion joke and a fetus have in common... The joke never gets old, and neither does the kid.
Why do oompa loompas secretly take Skinny Dips in Willy Wonka's chocolate?
They wanted some chocolate balls.
Name one person who would take an orphan?
Michael Jackson, so they can play all night.
I'm not suicidal, I'm just speedrunning life.
What's the difference between intelligence and apathy?
I don't know! I don't care!
POV: You liked this joke because you're straight.
Why can't women just shut the fuck up! I hate women. They need to know their place and stay in the kitchen and be baby makers...
Michael Jackson gets really ill, so he's rushed to hospital. When they get there, he says, "Am I in heaven?"
The doctor replies, "Nah, sir, we're just taking a quick shortcut through the children's ward."
Don't you just hate it when you're the first one to fall asleep at a sleepover, and then you hear, "Prank em, John?"
What do you get when King Kong steps on Batman and Robin?
Flatman and Ribbon.
What’s the only long-lasting thing from China?
Covid.
My mom told me to make my dad smile, and she will give me $100, so I said, "The Cowboys are gonna win the Super Bowl." He smiled, but my mom didn't give it to me.
Anyways, I forgot about my package coming, and the mailman came, and I said, "I like your hat; teal looks nice on you," and he smiled, and my mom gave me $100.
"Oh, waiter! Waiter!"
"Yes, sir?"
"Do you have frog's legs?"
"Why, yes."
"Good. Now hop along and get me a steak!"
What borders on stupidity?
Canada and Mexico.
When a woman decides to abort, it is called a decision, but when I run my truck into a playground of kids, it is called murder.
Any joke that I make about 9/11 has a tendency to crash and burn.