Worst Jokes Ever
Scissoring is nice when I grind my wee wee on my wife’s clit.
Humping that little guy is like riding a wet butt plug.
The best night of my life was when I gave my virginity to my wife, and her last word was when she called me "Mommy" at the top of her lungs before I knocked her up 😍.
I tried to start a music career, but it crashed harder than Paul Walker.
Flat Earther pickup line: "The Earth may be flat, but Uranus is round."
Yo mama so ugly, Itachi couldn't look at her to put her in a genjutsu.
Americans: We drive on the right side of the road.
The British: We drive on the left side of the road.
Russia: ROAD IS ROAD. *crashing noises follow*
What do you call a lying Mexican?
Pinocchico.
On the fourth month (Symbolizing 41%) on the first day, transgenders mourn for the trans suicides.
That day is called "April Fool's."
Why does the emo hate Christmas?
The ornaments get hanged, and they don't.
Russia.
What do clams do on their birthday? They shell-brate, but they eat all the cake for themselves because they’re shellfish!
Want to hear a joke about prostitution? Never mind, it's whoreable.
Yo mama so fat that when I banged her in the jacuzzi, there was a level 8 tsunami.
Did you hear about the exciting new drug they developed for lesbians with depression? They call it: TRICOXAGIN.
What do you call a kid with special needs with a gun? Special Forces.
Yo mama so stupid, she tried to stop the Cold War with a heater.
"History's repeating itself. WWIII is coming, and the second Russia nukes the U.S., they're all getting fucked."
Period blood is like KFC, because it's finger-licking good!
I was watching a documentary about how storks carry babies from their previous life to the next.
In his old life, Michael Jackson must’ve been a teddy bear. The storks let him play with kids for a change.
My mom died when we couldn’t remember her blood type. As she died, she kept telling us to “be positive,” but it’s hard without her.