W-what does, I mean uh, what is, um-, wh-what’s the difference, no... I mean- I mean what do you call a, um... sorry guys, i-i can’t do this😥🥺 *runs away in tears*
"Babe is it in?" "Yea." "Does it hurt?" "Uh huh." "Let me put it in slowly." "It still hurts." "Okay, let's try another shoe size."
Why does Donald Trump have a fervent crush on the Russian president?
He is Putin his Dick where it don't belong!
Person 1: “How many ph vids have you watched today? Person 2: “Seven” Person: 1: “What the fuck dude..” Person 2: “I know right? I’ve gotten seven ads for Pizza Hut in the past hour.” (Based on an encounter I had recently)
Why did the rapper bring a dictionary to the concert?
So he could DEFINE his own beats
Why did the rapper become a barber?
To TRIM his verses
Why did the rapper become a mathematician?
To count his STACKS of CASH
What did the rapper say to the traffic jam?
"Move over, I'm about to drop some FIRE”
Why did the rapper become a carpenter?
To NAIL his performances
Why did the rapper bring a parachute to the concert?
In case his lyrics made the crowd JUMP
Why did the rapper become an astronaut?
To drop some BARS in SPACE
Why did the rapper open a bakery?
To make some DOUGH on the side
How do rappers stay cool in the summer?
They drop ICE COLD rhymes
Why did the rapper bring a ladder to the studio?
Because he heard the MIC DROP was too high
My German girlfriend likes to rate our sex on a scale of 1-10.
Last night we tried anal, and she kept shouting “9!”
That's the best I've done so far.
Why are Alabamians so resentful of immigrants?
They don't want their sons and daughters to have sex with anyone other than their siblings or relatives.
How Chinese is COVID? About the same as those red MAGA hats made in China.
I seriously don't get why people in Alabama are angered that Mexican immigrants are taking their jobs. I mean, it's not like they are preventing your son from giving you a big fat blow job.
Why do people from Alabama abhor eating tacos and burritos?
Because their meat has to be in bread.
If Mexico is an unredeemable shithole, then how come the Republicans' favourite senator, Ted Cruz, ran to Mexico as fast as he could after a little bit of snow in his home?
