Worst Jokes Ever
Why doesn't Jesus participate in Battle Raps?
All his comebacks take three days.
Hey, guy, you suck! Why do I suck? Because you're the one that's sucking juice out of a straw.
Job Interviewer: Where do you see yourself in the next five years?
Me: I'd say my biggest weakness is listening.
Leave a man on a plane, and he flies for a day.
Throw a man off a plane, and he flies for the rest of his life.
I think one of my dads might be gay.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Yo mama!
Why did Marxism never catch on in England?
Because then it would be impossible to get proper tea.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Luke.
Luke who?
Luke through the keyhole and you’ll see.
Yo Momma so hairy, she has to shampoo her armpits.
What's the difference between your mom and a laundromat washer?
The washer doesn't take loads for free.
What did Cinderella say when she sat on Pinocchio? "Lie to me."
What does the blind man say when he walks past the fish market?
"Hello, ladies!"
What happened to the frog that partied illegally?
He got TOAD away!
What did Snow White say when she sat on Pinocchio? "Lie to me."
I told my teacher, "I’m failing life." She said, "That’s not on the syllabus."
What do women and a Happy Meal have in common?
They both come with a toy.
I told my therapist I feel suicidal. He charged me in advance.
I’m not saying my life’s a joke. I’m saying it’s the punchline no one asked for.
I bought a coffin on Black Friday. It was a killer deal.
Yo mama so fat...
...people in Florida start buying flood insurance when they see her waddling toward the ocean.