Worst Jokes Ever
I took my pony to the vet because I thought he was making a funny noise when he neighed. The vet said everything was okay and he was just a little horse.
How do you know when you have been invited to a gay barbecue?
When you are unable to distinguish foot-long hot dogs from long and thick big dicks, regardless of skin color.
What do a 9V battery and a butthole have in common?
We know we’re not supposed to put our tongue on them, but we do it anyway.
Ukrainians leave without saying goodbye.
Russians say goodbye without leaving.
How do you find a black person in the dark without a flashlight?
Tell them a joke to make them smile.
Q. What did the United Healthcare CEO say after he got shot? A. I don't know. I don't own a Ouija board.
I know how to cut down on Medicare expenses.
Lock Alzheimer's patients in dog cages when they misbehave.
I wish my grass were emo, so it would cut itself.
What did one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob?
If we don't get some support soon, people are gonna think we're nuts.
Q: How do you know you're at a gay barbecue? A: All the hot dogs taste like shit.
How do you play chess with a Catholic?
You put a condom on the bishop.
Do you know what the secret is to have a smoking, hot body as a senior citizen?
Cremation.
I was going to tell a ghost joke, but it just seemed so mean-spirited.
What is the difference between a nun and a prostitute?
One kneels to pray, one kneels to pay.
Why are cops worried about drunk drivers and not elderly drivers?
What do you call a white person from Africa?
Albino.
Do you know the number one cause of death for lesbians?
Getting your fingers stuck in there.
What is the difference between a nun and a prostitute?
One serves the nailed to the cross, one nailed by her boss.
What is the difference between a nun and a prostitute?
One is for Sunday morning, and one is for Sunday night.
Q. What's the difference between Donald Trump and orange Jello?
A. The Jello has a higher IQ.