Yours jokes
If you can make a woman laugh, you're almost there.
If you're almost there and then she laughs, then you've got a whole different problem on your hands.
It’s like Sonic always says, “If you’re ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?”
Your kid's so ugly he would make a Happy Meal cry.
What do you never say to gay people?
IF YOUR HAPPY AND YOU KNOW IT CLAP YOUR HANDS! 🤣🤣🤣🏳️🌈
Do you wanna eat makeup, 'cause you're not pretty on the inside?
Your hairline goes so far back, I remember seeing it in the Stone Age.
Even Michael Jordan can't dunk from your hairline! 🤣🤣
Weed: *gets hit by his own power*
Cop: Wait, shouldn’t you be resistant to your own element?
Weed: Are you resistant to bullets when you shoot a gun?
How do you disappoint people in Africa?
Send a message saying that you’re going to send trucks full of food, water, and clothing.
But don’t follow through and send the trucks empty.
Your mama's like a cardboard box: open to the public and easy to nail.
Bully: Shut up, motherfucker!
Me: Well, stop talking to me and I won't have to keep fucking your mother.
Your mom does not need the internet. She's already worldwide.
Your mom is so fat Buzz Lightyear had to say "To infinity to beyond" to leave her house.
Your hairline is so curved that McDonald's hired you to be their "M."
Teacher on school bus, "Everybody sit down now, the bus is about to start."
Ben: "I’m not going to sit down. I don’t want to."
Teacher: "You have to, or else you have to get off the bus."
Teacher: "*stands up*"
Ben: "Then you should get off the bus 'cause you're not sitting."
A teacher wanted to sing, so she did. This is what she said:
"You have no family, even though you're broker than me."
"Remember, switching to your pistol is always faster than reloading."
- Sun Tzu, The Art of War.
Your mom is so fat that when she went on top of one of the Twin Towers, it collapsed.
Your mama is so ugly whenever she threw a boomerang, it refused to come back.
The earth was once flat... until they buried your mom.