Yours jokes
Imagine there’s a funny joke here. Imagine it? Great! Now check yourself into an insane asylum because you’re schizophrenic.
1, 2 look at your shoes.
3, 4 they look better than yours.
5, 6 you have no friends.
7, 8 you look like a ape.
9, 10 don't you like men?
11, 12 hell naw I like females.
There was this Down syndrome boy that always wanted to be a cop, and he did. He pulled someone over and said, "Know why I pulled you over?"
The guy replied, "Because I was speeding?"
He said, "No, because you're black."
When your little brother hears noise from your room and you're the only one in it.
A bear is like your best mate, Harry.
If you stab them, they die from a stab wound.
Me: punching a kid.
My FBI agent: You're adopted.
The orphanage said I couldn't go home.
Your dad is gone.
What do you call it when Portericans surround your house?
A spicket fence!
At weddings, old people tell kids, "You're next!"
At funerals, little kids tell old people, "You're next!"
Yeah man, you watch Pornhub, and you have premium too, but at least I don't need Premium to see your mom in bed.
I'd tell you a 9/11 joke, but it'd fly over your head and into the Twin Towers.
You're so dumb that every time you use the bathroom, you use your shoe to wipe your ass.
How to become a monkey?
Put a red dot on your forehead.
I bet you're a child molester who got out of jail and is now sexually harassing kids such as Addison! Will fuck off and get a life, btw your roasts are not fucking funny, they're bullshit like your face and your hairline.
Women: Can I have your number?
Jesus: No.
Women: Why? Are you scared?
Jesus: No. Just when you wanna talk, just pray.
Imagine when you are about to cry at the funeral, then your friend's phone rings.
Then he says, "I'll call you back, I'm still at the die."
If the teacher tells you to stand up if you're not gay and there's that one kid in the wheelchair.
If Tim goes to heaven and Tom goes to hell, where does Tam go?
Up your ass.
(Me) Hey bro, tell me a joke!
(My friend) Your mom. *Starts Laughing*
(Me) *Fakes laughs* *then points a gun at him*
At this moment, he knew he fucked up.
The other day I was in the park and got bored, so I found an orphan and punched him in the face, laughed at him, and said, "Whatcha gonna do, tell your parents?"