Train Driver jokes

My boss yelled at me the other day, “You’ve got to be the worst train driver in history. How many trains did you derail last year?”

I said, “Can’t say for sure, it’s so hard to keep track!”

Your mother is responsible for all the train drivers that are never ever late. She taught them all to pull out on time.

What's white, yellow and goes 40 mph?

A train driver's egg sandwich.

Today was a terrible day. My ex got hit by a bus, and I lost my job as a bus driver.

To become a licensed airline pilot requires 1,500 hours (two years) of training. But it only takes 10 seconds to steal the pilot’s jacket and hat.

Confucius say, man who runs behind car will get exhausted, but man who runs in front of car will get tired.

Say all you want about priests, but at least they drive slowly in school zones.