You're jokes
Yo hairline is so crooked it makes your gay best friend look straight.
Your hairline looks like a car!
Suicide really isn't something to joke about, unless it's hanging yourself.
It's a really quicker way to die, and less blood spilled for your mother to clean up.
A bullet is like an arrow.
Nothing can stop it from going through your head.
Your forehead's so big that you dream in 4k.
You're so fat that you cause your heart to have panic attacks.
Your mama so ugly, when the baby came out of her, the baby didn't cry. The baby said, "What the hell is this shit?" and walked out of the hospital.
What do you do when you're sad?
Nothing, because you are just crying about something happening to you.
"Sike, I lied, your dick is dry."
Yo mama so fat, when she jumped in the ocean, the whales said, "We are family, even though you're fatter than me!"
How can you tell if your husband is dead?
The sex is the same, but you get to use the remote.
I didn't break my back in the accident, thankfully.
But I can break yours today, hopefully.
Your hairline's so far back even Rosa Parks refused to sit there.
Bob: Can I come to your house to meet your family?
Orphan: I don't have a family.
It's tricky when you're both a moth and a sea captain in charge of a ship, but up ahead, you see a lighthouse.
How to become a monkey?
Put a red dot on your forehead.
One day, I'm going to Malta to a big hotel. In the morning, I go down to eat breakfast. I tell the waitress I want two pieces of toast. She brings me only one piece. I tell her I want a piece. She says, "Go to the toilet." I say, "You don't understand. I want a piece on my plate." She says, "You better not piss on your plate, you son of a bitch." I don't even know the lady, and she calls me a son of a bitch.
I don't need this shit!!
Later, I go to eat at the big restaurant. The waitress brings me a spoon and a knife, but no fork. I tell her I wanted a fork. She tells me everyone wanna fuck. I say, "You don't understand, I want a fork on my table." She says, "You better not fuck on the table, you son of a bitch." I don't even know the lady, and she calls me a son of a bitch.
I don't need this shit!
So, I go back to my room in a hotel, and there are no sheets on the bed. I call the manager and tell him I want a sheet. He tells me, go to the toilet. I say, "You don't understand, I want a sheet on my bed." He says, "You better not shit on my bed, you son of a bitch."
I go to the checkout, and the man at the desk says, 'Peace on you.' I say, 'Piss on you too, you son of a bitch. I'm going back to Italia. Arrivederci!'
I don't need this shit!
Moral of the story, don't go to Australia with a Korean accent.
Your mama so fat she sunk the HMS ship!
Your hairline goes even further back than the last time your parents said "I love you."
Why don't you have a life?
Because you're ugly.