You're jokes
What does your girl do to me? She sucks me off.
I know your name is baller cause I'm gonna put my baller into yo MOTHER HOLLER!
If you're bored, joke about an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
I can tell you used to be friends with your hairline, cuz it goes way back.
Alicia was not a popular girl. None of the guys noticed her. Once she got a boyfriend, but then he cheated on her with Katy and said, "You're not sexy enough, Katy is much hotter."
So Alicia took a match, set herself on fire, and screamed, "THIS GIRL IS ON FIRE!"
And then she died.
You know you're high when you hold all your pineapples hostage and yell, "SpongeBob, I know you're in there!"
COVID-19. IN YOUR FACE! HAHA!
Being a hooker shouldn't be illegal.
It's like having an Airbnb for your dick.
Me: *stabs vampire*
Wife: omg
Me: *beats vampire to death*
Wife: OMG
Me: What?
Wife: You're supposed to give them candy!
Me: Well, that's a sticky situation now, isn't it, Barbara?
Your teeth are so yellow, you spit butter!
Waitress: You wanna box for your leftovers?
Me: No, but I'll arm wrestle you for the check.
Why did your mom cross the road?
You were on the same side as her, and she wanted to get as far away from you as possible.
What is the most expensive type of sex you will ever enjoy in your life? The type which will shorten your life by 5 to 10 years.
Your forehead is so big when you walk by I can't see what's in front of me.
Your hairline is so big, it looks like the TITANIC.
You've got a body inside you--it's called your body bones.
Your forehead is so big that it couldn’t handle an acute angle.
You were supposed to be born in the tree.
The sticks were your siblings.
Time for double joke Tuesday.
What is a bird's favorite letter?
A C gull.
So I won a round of CSGO with my team, then on VC, some kid trash talked me.
Kid: You're a dick, you know!
Me: And you're a pussy, you know?
A guy was doing bad things and died and went to hell.
Demon: Why you sad?
Guy: I’m in hell, can’t you see?
Demon: Well, we have fun here at hell.
Guy: Really? Nice.
Demon: We do sleeping in on Mondays.
Guy: OoOoOo
Demon: Tuesdays we swim in our lava or dive in fire. If you die, you’re already dead ☠️
Guy: Ok, does that mean I’m a ghost?
Demon: No, you're not a ghost.
Demon: Wednesdays we do a dance party and smoke and drink 🍺
Guy: Ooooooo, I can’t wait 😜
Demon: Thursdays we drink all day until we throw up and die, and you're already dead, remember that?
Guy: Ok, but I am dead, and if I die again, I was already dead, right?
Demon: Yup.
Demon: I have a question: Are you gay, and do you like kissing fire girls, and if you die, you are already dead?
Guy: Ummm, I am not gay, and I don’t like kissing fire girls 😱😱😱
Demon: Then you won’t like Friday or Saturday or Sunday, heheh.
Guy: I’m dead for real in the hell 🪦🏴☠️☠️☠️💀
Hell helll helll R.I.P hell is gone for now.