How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
Make him clap until his parents come back.
You Jokes
What is the difference between a guitar and a fish?
You can't tuna fish.
What do you call a guy on fire in a wheelchair?
Hot wheels.
Hi, I did not get your text. I texted you when I texted you. You are not [responding].
How does the sea say hello?
It WAVES you.
SEA what I did there?
I'm SHORE you saw it.
Don't be SALTY!
Why do you make fun of disabled people?
They can't stand up for themselves.
How do you know when a cabbage is boiled?
The wheelchair floats to the top.
What did the cow say to the cheese? I am your father.
What do you call a cow that's laying down? Ground Beef.
You and your mom.
What do you call a Mexican without a car?
Carlos.
Why did Princess Diana cross the road?
She wasn’t wearing her seatbelt.
Did you know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her head and shoulders all over the windshield.
What do you call a vegan cow?
A vegan cow. :/
OR
A regular cow. 🐄🙌
R.I.P. boiled water. You will be mist.
Charizarding.
When you light a girl's pubes on fire, put it out with your jizz, then flap your arms and say, "You don't have enough badges to train me!"
One day, a skeleton wasn't laughing. Someone asked him why he was not laughing. It turns out he fell and broke his bone, his funny bone that is.
What's the difference between a baby and a ball?
If you inflate the ball, it won't explode.
Hey, can you hold this for a second?
The gayest person in the world is Pacman. You can pay him to eat 200 balls.
How do you make antifreeze?
You steal her blanket.
A kid with hallucinations and cancer is on a Jeopardy game show.
"What's behind curtain #1... YOU HAVE WON..... CANCER!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
