You jokes

What do you call a shocked Chinese man?

"Hu le fuk!"

Were you bought on a highway? Because that's where most accidents happen.

What do you call a rich orphan?

Batman.

Your face looks like my butt, but it looks like you.

There was a disabled kid at my door. He said, "I'm selling some cookies, want to buy one?" I said, "Well, if you stand up, sure."

Q: How do you turn a cat into a fish?

A: Tell the woman not to wash down there.

You are so ugly, when you looked in the mirror your reflection walked away.

What do you call a cupcake with no frosting? A frosting cupcake.

A priest walks outside and finds two young boys sitting on a big ice cube. The priest asks what they are doing. The boys answer that the priest always likes a couple of cold ones before he goes on.

If you're ever frustrated, just punch them in the face. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?

"Hey, man, do you have any Ben and Jerry's?"

"Yeah, I have two of them, fresh and preserved in the freezer."

"I meant the ice cream, bro..."

What do you call a retard with AK special forces?

I told some orphan that you can see your family, but I meant Spider-Man: Homecoming...

What do you call a guy named Kaiden?

I don't know, lol.

Bully says, "You are DISGUSTING!!!!!!"

The girl says, "Just like your face."

If you can’t touch your brain or see your brain, you don’t have a brain?

Last post for today, but I had to say one more thing! Tomorrow I am going to Six Flags, and I am literally so excited! It is going to be so much fun. Hope you guys have a good MLK JR. day! Woohooo!

What did the orphan poker player say to the elder?

“Will you raise me?”

Yo mama's so stupid, when thieves broke into her house and stole the TV, she chased after them shouting, "Wait, you forgot the remote!"

What kind of birthday cake do you get on September 11th?

Three small ones, so you can have a flight of different cake flavors!