You jokes
What do you call a Muslim in a swimming pool? A bath bomb.
What's the difference between you and an orphan?
Nothing.
How do you tell if a blond is really stupid?
Put a scratch and sniff on a bleach pod.
"Kidnapping is just surprise adoption, congrats! You are now all my children! Just hop into the portal that leads to the Lust Ring in Hell!"
You know Imagine Dragons?
Imagine draggin' these balls.
If you boil a funny bone, it becomes a laughing stock. That's humerus.
You could say Japanese car fans and ancient Egyptians are alike—they both worship Datsun.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.
What kind of trumpet are you playing?
An "Donald Trumpet"!
Are you a school? Because I want to shoot kids inside you.
What do you call a fat person in a wheelchair?
A broken wheelchair.
Have you ever walked into Helen Keller’s house?
She has.
What do you call my sister?
Suicidal.
Like if you think oily men are hot.
It's okay, you had socks on :)
Who is Joe?
You reply back: Who is Candice?
They reply back: Who is Candice?
You say: "Candice nuts fit into Joe Mama's mouth."
What do you call having a 69 with a guy in a wheelchair?
MEALS ON WHEELS :-)
What do you call Hiroshima and Nagasaki?
The world's first microwaves.
I saw a kid crying in the corner of the room and I said, "Are you OK? Where are your parents?" and he started crying even more.
I love working in an orphanage.
When you think about it, Hitler wasn’t a bad person. He killed Hitler.