You jokes
If you see a woman get raped, just walk away. Don't bother helping. They're independent women, after all.
You know you're ugly when you get handed the camera every time your friends have a group picture.
What’s the only victimless crime you can commit? Murder, cause there’s a victim less!
Here is a dark joke for you guys... "Why do pornstars scream, "DADDY!" in their videos? Because they were child molested by their father!"
Guy 2 whispering: Oh, I got tired of acting gay.
Guy 1: I heard you. Why are you acting gay?
Guy 2: To attract gays and then give them advice.
Guy 1: So what's your advice to me?
Guy 2: That I just know you're gay.
LOL xD
A happy mother: "Why is your sister so quiet?! And how did you get super glue stuck on your penis?!"
Why do ducks have feathers?
So you don't see their butt. *quack* (crack)
Bro, stop. You guys are saying the same jokes over and over. If you're gonna tell a 9/11 joke, just go laugh about the Great Thumps.
My mum told me to take out the trash, but I couldn’t find you.
Girlfriend: You remind me of a cellphone.
Ex-Boyfriend: How and why?
Girlfriend: Because you're about to die!
How do you enter your house?
Through Bill Gates!
How do you get a million fans?
Just run through Africa with a bottle of water.
How do you fix a broken pizza? With tomato paste.
What's the only good part of your crush dying before you have the chance to bang her?
She can't say no!
Judge: We shall now sentence you for the murder of your parents.
Accused: Please consider a lenient sentence, your honor.
Judge: But why?
Accused: Because I’m an orphan.
What do you call a group of Emos?
Suicide squad.
What do you call a terrorist in a wheelchair?
RC-XD
What do you call an anorexic blond with a yeast infection?
... A quarter pounder with cheese.
Little boy: Are you an orphan?
Orphan: Yes, what gave me away?
Little boy: Your parents.
Salman Rushdie got a new book out.
It's called "Buddha. You Fat Cunt."