You jokes
All you pro-life Christian motherfuckers can go die, lol.
Why is it bad to climb a tree?
You might fall on an orphan! 🫥
Vegan Teacher the musical.
Miss Kadie - "Oh no, you poor dead animal!"
Mr. Beast- 🎶 "You're a dumb Communist, Miss Kadie" 🎶
Chandler-🎵 "Yup, you're one high fluting son of a gun" 🎵
Mr. Beast- 🎵 "I just gobbled up a quadruple patty from my restaurant" 🎵
Miss Kadie - 🎵 "Don't hurt animals kids, do you want to be a vegans 'R' us kid?" 🎵
Kids- 🎵 "We've had enough of your problems, Miss Kadie, you're such a commie!"
Miss Kadie - 🎵 "I just want to die because I'm so sad!"
- Miss Kadie jumps off Mr. Beast Burger and commits suicide.
What do you call a Chinese man in the summer heat? Boi Ling.
what do you call a white person having a seizure?
a vanilla shake.
Have you ever stepped in Stephen Hawking's house?
Neither has he. 😂😂
I was gonna tell you a Kobe Bryant joke.
But it would just crash and burn.
There was always that one specific person you thought ruined your life, but it turns out your life has always been ruined by you being in it.
How come you never see a gay person in a wheelchair?
It’s hard to be a fruit, when you’re already a vegetable.
What do you call a kid with a special sense of humor? Autism, hahaha!
Bianca: Mr. Doeken, even though I completed my test, you still said it was "late." Why is that?
Mr. Dowon: Bianca, for the LAST TIME, MY LAST NAME IS DOWON!
Bianca (🤨): Are you sure?
Mr. Dowon (😒): What do you need, Bianca?
Bianca: It's Bianca!
Mr. Dowon: Are you sure?
Did you hear about the two burglars that stole a calendar?
I hear they got six months each.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special forces.
A man and a boy are walking into a forest. It begins to get dark. The boy says "Mister, I'm scared." The man replies "How do you think I feel, I have to walk back alone."
I was being interviewed by Elon Musk. He asked, "Where are you from?" and I said Portugal. He replied, "So you are a fellow countryman of a Pen merchant whose freekick ball broke my rover on Mars. Get out!!" Tears ran down my face. Shame on you, Penaldo, for costing me my dream job!
What do you call a woman with three boobs? Tres leches.
Does your shoe have a hole in it?
No.
Then how did you put your foot in it?
How do you win an argument against an emo?
Kick the chair!
How do you plan a party in outer space?
You planet.
There were four people in a helicopter: Trump, a first-grade kid, a schoolteacher, and the Chinese leader.
There were only three parachutes. The Chinese leader takes one and jumps. The schoolteacher says she has to teach, so she jumps. Trump and the first-grader are left. Trump says, "I've lived my life; you take the last one." So the kid puts on his backpack and jumps. Trump makes it out safe.