You jokes
Do you want to know why they call it an orphanage? Because they couldn't call it orphans home.
Boys: “Hey, can Billy come out and play baseball?”
Mom: “That’s not funny, you know Billy doesn’t have any arms and legs.”
Boys: “I know, we need a third base.”
A pedophile is chatting on the internet: "On a scale of one to ten, how old are you?"
You see a kid on the side of the street crying, so you go up to them and say, "Where are your parents?" The kid says, "What are parents?"
What do you call it when a friend calms his suicidal friend? "Hang in there, buddy."
I SH so much, even when I die and become a ghost, you can see red stripes floating around the room.
What do you call a dad in the mirror?
(Your imagination.)
You wanna know what's the difference between a girl and a refrigerator? "A refrigerator doesn't moan when I put my meat in it."
Your forehead is so big it gets home before you do.
Broccoli is like anal sex.
If you're forced to have it as a child, you probably won't like it as an adult.
In Saudi Arabia, our pick up lines are, "Girl, are you a terrorist? Cuz you da bomb."
What do you call a special police officer?
Officer down!
Why does Helen Keller hate the national anthem? Oh, say, can you see?
Sex is like math.
You add a bed.
Subtract the clothes.
Divide the legs.
And pray you don’t multiply.
Rules of Dark humor:
1. All subject matter can be used, nothing is off limits.
2. No saying "Me" or "My Life" as a joke. Nobody finds those funny. We want actual good and meaningful jokes.
3. Don't Repeat Previously Posted Jokes. If you are saying the same joke that the person right before you posted you are just begging for attention and nobody by any means likes that.
I will add more in the future and be frequent on this site.
- Sincerely, Zane
Did you hear about the man who was accidentally buried alive? -- It was a grave mistake.
How do you make 7 an even number? Take the "s" out!
What can you say to make a rape victim feel better?
"It will be over soon."
What is the difference between a man performing anilingus on a woman and a man performing cunnilingus on a woman?
If a man is performing anilingus on a woman, it is not classified as heterosexual sodomy, you fucking idiot!!!!!
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
A “Lickalottapuss”.