You jokes

If the genie from Aladdin was here, my three wishes would be for you to die, your kids to have a miserable life, and for everyone you love to die.

What do you get when you cross a cow and the Kool-Aid Man? Donald Trump, cuz of his red face and juicy tits.

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What do you call a un-funny rock?

A normal rock.

Why did Mom cross the road?

To kill you!

"Hey man, what’s your name? Oh, my name is... Do your balls hang low? Can you swing it to and fro? Can you tie it in a knot? Can you tie it in a bow?"

What do you call a Mexican rooster?

Un gallo pelón.

What time is it when you get home? Can you walk, walk home? Was your night night? You had fun? I had dinner, night time, and a tree. I had dinner. Is it a magic time? Dinner! I have been home. Was good.

Do you like Mirah?

Mirah-t nuts.

What do you call a deaf child?

-Ryan Simmonite-

Hi, I did not get your email address. I sent you a...

What does a pillow say when you live for a week? "Don't forget me!"

Did you hear how Stephen Hawking died? He lost WiFi connection.

Mother: We need to talk about sex...

Jason: Oh, sex, tell me what do you wanna know.

Jason had a big whooping from his mother and big spanking from his dad.

What do you call a magic car that I can do to help me out for you and I will be doing a great day?

What did one statue say to another statue? "Hey! Is that you?"

You thought his puns were bad, wait till you sea mine!

How can you tell if a gay guy has a high sperm count?

Chew when you swallow!

If you thought other puns were bad, wait till you sea mine.

You take four, then you put a "n" at the end, then you take the "u" out, then you replace the "f" with a "p". What do you get?