You jokes

I did a walk today and had dinner 🍴 night time to do you a good dinner 🍴 night and dinner 🍴 night. I love 💕 was the chicken 🍗 I had to go get dinner 🍴 night night dinner 🍴 night time to be good to get a night sleep 💤 night night fun day tomorrow.

When you're excited to finally see your sister, and then you realize she's wearing your clothes.

Hi, how are you doing?

Adopted kid:

Hey, Alex, what are you doing?

Alex:

Nothing, just playing my game. Anyways, you know you can call me "dad."

Adopted kid:

OK, dad Alex.

Alex:

Oh, come on! My game! I’m winning. Let’s go!

Adopted kid:

I’m so glad I have a mom.

Mississippi is a long word. How do you spell it?

Have you heard of the man who got all his left side chopped off?

He was all right.

So I told my sister, "Want [to] hear some jokes?" and she was like, "Hit me with [your] best shot, fire away," and I was like, "Okay, I know [you're] singing an old song, yeah I was trying to see if [you] sing too," and I said, "Who do [you] think I am, Chris Brown?"

Like if you know what ashes are.

What did the fork say to the cake?

A: "I want a piece of you!"

I will tell you a joke--your life.

Why are you gay?

A school shooter enters a kindergarten classroom. Little Timmy says, “He’s my daddy!”

The teacher, Mr. Mortez, screams. Little Timmy then says, “Mr. Mortez, my daddy says you’re a big fat whale and he wants to roll you all the way to Canada!” *pushes Mr. Mortez* Little Timmy says, “Hail f**king Canada!”

Are you Roblox? 'Cuz I wanna play ya all day.

I have a riddle for you:

10 people are on a boat, but they all die due to a tsunami except the captain.

Then, when he gets home, his wife serves him “penguin meat.”

Once he eats it, he starts crying.

Why?

Yo, you have the biggest Oliver brain, which means you are the dumbest boy ever.

You're built like a Windows touchscreen!

Autists either believe everything you tell them or are nonstop skeptics. There is no in-between.

Hey, guy, you suck! Why do I suck? Because you're the one that's sucking juice out of a straw.

You have 10 to live.

“Wait, as in 10 minutes?”

10, 9, 8...

Why do you think China should have a baseball team?

They can destroy the entire world with a single bat.