You jokes

What do you call an orphan's selfie?

A family photo.

Yo mama is so stupid, when she saw on her computer it said "You have 3 cookies," she broke it.

Me: MOM, I'm tired.

Mom: Take a nap.

Me: No, I can't sleep if Dad isn't here.

Mom: *hangs picture of dad on her room wall* Well, now you can.

Son: Dad, can I get a girlfriend?

Dad: Son, no, you are only 10, so no.

Son: Dad, I'm leaving to get a girlfriend.

Dad: Son, nooo, you are not my son!

Son: What did you say? *Son slaps the dad.*

Dad: Good, son, goodbye, get out of my home.

Son: Good, you can go move to a new home.

Bro, you teeth are so yellow that you can't brush your teeth.

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Q: Ten shepherds out in the sheep field. How do you know which one's gay?

A: He's the one the sheep fuck!

(I'm gay, and I know this joke is demeaning and inappropriate, but I still think it's funny as a 2-inch penis.)

Daddy, why is this red soup so sweet?

Because your mother has diabetes.

"-Hey dude, you got some beef? You want some beef from me?"

"- No thanks... I'm vegetarian!"

What do you call a bad pun?

The pun is not punny!

If your best friend tells you that he's gay for you, what do you do? Tell him, "Oh, nice gay ass."

What do you call cringe?

You.

What do you call a fish with a temper?

Undyne.

What do you call your mom when she goes into the shower?

A shower ma! (shawarma)

When do you take a cow to the movies?

On a mooo-vie!

You you you like like like like my joke nooooooooooooooooowwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!

#1: What are you doing?

#2: Watching a movie.

#1: Oh, I know why, because you move-ie.

Are you an egg? 'Cause your jokes ain't funny.

Two tourists climb a mountain that utters certain doom.

One tourist falls down. The tourist that's still on the mountain says, "You ok down there?"

The other tourist says, "Can't I just rest in peace?!"

My friend had a house FULL of okra, but it blew up and okra was everywhere.

I guess you can call that place Okra-homa!