You jokes
Me: You know your parents were very good people.
Orphan: Wow, I didn’t know that.
Me: I know, you're an orphan.
You want to know what annoying people and dogs have in common.
The female ones are called "bitch."
Why are you sitting down to pee? I don't have a good back and can't lift something big.
Huh what you say?
Come fight me, suck a dick.
I said to the orphan, "Do you want me to take you to your family? Oh wait..."
Memes
Have you heard of the work called "ligma balls?"
How do you get away with murder?
How do you get a country girl's attention? A tractor.
My mum told me to take you to the zoo and throw you in the lake, but I couldn't find you.
During the Great War, a man holding a machine gun shoots down a swarm of soldiers running on a swamp.
He says: "You came to the wrong swamp, Americans! You came to the wrong swamp!" *He didn't stop firing.*
Q: What do you call a security guard at Samsung?
A: Guardians of the Galaxy.
"Piggy killed you with a bat because he is fat 0-0."
You don’t need a parachute to go skydiving. You need a parachute to go skydiving more than once.
Why have sex when you can perv on your neighbor's grandma!
The best part about being a medical student is, you will never run out of jokes.
You so fat you got thrown out the window, but the window threw you back inside.
If your wife says: “What would you most like to do to my body?” “Identify it” is the wrong answer.
What do you call a kid that’s cold and his name is war?
Cold War.
Imagine getting rickrolled. Oh, I forgot, you already got rickrolled yesterday.
What do you call a guy in a wheelchair that walks into a fire?
Hot Wheels.