You Jokes

Jedi

What do you call a Jedi that can use the force to fly?

A Jedi Flight.

Skeleton

A skeleton walks into a bar and said it takes "backbone" to mess with me, and if you try to insult me, I have thick skin.

Superpower

You’re so lame, you don’t have a superpower!

"Yah, I do!"

Oh yeah? What is it?

"My diaphragm contracts and moves downwards into my chest cavity and my lungs expand!"

That’s breathing, Jim.

"NO IT’S NOT, JACOB, YOU CAN’T PROVE IT!"

Nut

Q: You have problems, I think your disease is BOOFA.

Q: What boofa?

A: Boofa deez nuts in yo mouth!

Cannibal

Did you hear about the cannibal that came home late?

His wife gave him the cold shoulder.

Difference

What is the difference between a dog and a cat?

I don't know either.

Why do you think I asked you? ;)

Bank

Why do you go to the bank?

To get money.

When do you run from the bank?

When the cops come.

Baker

I'll pat-your-breasts, pat-your-breasts, cos I'm a baker's man, and you bring me an orgasm as fast as you can. I'll pat you, and prick you, and mark you with my "D", and then put you in the oven for the bitch and me!

Dog

I'm happy that I named my dog "I Know What You Did." It's funny to see how much people get scared when I call him.