Mom, what happens if you swear at a church?
Well, honey, a tee posing nun with glowing red eyes and nunchucks will beat you.
You Jokes
Me: 911. You: You died 9/11.
What do you call a dick that doesn't fit in an asshole?
A misfit.
Peter: *curses*
Sam: Wow, do you kiss your mom with that mouth?
Peter: Jokes on you, I don't have a mom.
Tony: *having a heart attack* AFSJDHFKJJD Peter, we talked about this!!!
Hi Gwen, how is life!
A. Bad, lame, and suckish.
B. Good, awesome, and you are loved!
C. Perfect!
I'm guessing that your life is NOT B nor C! Man, you're such an asshole!
How do you tell a male skeleton from a female skeleton by the BONERS lmao?
Imposter: Did you do Sawcon task?
Crewmate: What's Sawcon?
Imposter: Sawcon deez nuts!
Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you!
What do you call an underwater maid?
A mermaid! 😂😂😂😂
What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a nail?
Answer: You can unscrew the nail.
You wanna talk Alya and JK Master?
Me: Do you know a funny joke?
Friend: Yes, you.
I bet when your mom first saw you, she said, "Oh my god, this ain't my child. My child would look amazing."
That moment when you poop 😂
What do you call a dwarf that fell into a cement mixer?
A wee hard man.
Have you heard of deez nuts?
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you glad I didn't make a 9/11 joke?
You know that feeling when you're going through a school parking lot and go over a speed bump, then you realize that there are no speed bumps?
Boy/girl: I love you.
Me: I love me too! But sorry, my mom said I can't date trash. Go back to the trashcan.
The boy/girl: I- *Is depressed*
Teacher: Students, tomorrow bring your parents to the open house.
Student one orphan: I don't have any.
Student 2: What is the difference between you and an escaped prisoner?
Student one orphan: What!
Student 2: The prisoner gets picked.