You jokes
What did the parents say to the orphans?
"YOU CAN'T SEE ME!"
There are two kids sitting in a classroom: Lily and John. Lily sleeps in class every day.
The teacher asks Lily who made heaven and earth. John pokes her with a pencil. She shouts, "Jesus Christ Almighty!"
The teacher says, "That's right."
The teacher says the next day she asks the same question. John pokes her with a pencil. She shouts, "Jesus Christ Almighty!"
"That's right," the teacher says.
The next day she asks Lily what did Eve say to Adam after their 100th. John pokes her again. "If you stick that thing in me one more time, I'mma break it in half!" she shouts.
All go gansta until the two towers fall down on you.
When you tell the men in the suits you can see that the demons of your sins are watching you...
But they know you're blind.
What do you call a AK-47 that lost 1 point?
An AK-46.
What do you call a Russian rifle that went 1 rank down?
An AK-46.
Bob the builder took one look at you and said, "Nah, I can’t fix that!"
Why can you slap an orphan?
Are they going to tell mommy?
What do you call a fat person in a wheelchair?
A broken wheelchair.
What do you call a disabled Asian?
"Sum ting wong."
What do you get when you cross a road with a stalker?
Raped.
What do you call a gay woman? I don't know.
You are so ugly Santa goes "ho ho ho holy sh*t."
Did I ever tell you my father should have been on the plane that crashed into the Twin Towers?
But that's just my opinion.
Did you know the F in orphan stands for family... Oh wait, haha.
We should stop making jokes about orphans before they tell their parents... Oh, continue.
Some guy came to me and said, "I'm your dad's friend. He asked me to pick you up."
*Laughing freaking hard* and told him, "Did you dig the grave?"
Popular girl: Sorry I'm late.
Teacher: Why are you late!
Girl: I need my beauty sleep.
Nerd: Well, you might need to hibernate because you ain't pretty.
Bro, stop. You guys are saying the same jokes over and over. If you're gonna tell a 9/11 joke, just go laugh about the Great Thumps.
You don't need a parachute to go skydiving. You only need a parachute to go skydiving twice.
A man went to the library and asked for a book about suicide. The librarian said, "Go away, you won’t bring it back."