You jokes

Sex is like show and tell: you show your pussy and dick, and then you tell each other how you feel.

POV: You walk up to your short friend and say, "How is the weather down there?"

Q: What do you call 6 gay men in the army?

A: Rainbow Six Siege.

"When your mom is pregnant and your best friend learns dad jokes."

Me:.....

How do you know when Kobe Bryant is famous?

His face was chiseled in a mountain.

When you're at school and you have to wipe your ass, but it's only one ply...

Your finger breaks through... mmm, finger lickin' good.

Rape: The only crime where you have to tell the victim they couldn't do anything even if they could run or say something, then after, are told rapists stop them doing something about it.

Have you heard about the pedophile who was found guilty of robbery?

- He robbed children of their innocence.

What do you call an orphan taking a selfie?

A family portrait........

You might say I'm mean but what are they gonna do..... tell their parents?

Wait..........

Her: I love Kobe Bryant!

Me: Helicopter Helicopter

Her:.....

Me: At least you don't say save the trees, cus damn Kobe is good.

I went to my girlfriend's house one day in Alabama when I met her brother. He said, "Well, I guess there's no more you stuck in the dryer."