You jokes

You know I'm gay! I'm gay! I'm really, really gay!

Friend: I broke up with Sara.

Me: I know, she came over and I screwed her hard.

Friend: How did her pussy feel?

Me: After about 2 inches, it felt brand new.

Friend: What do you— HOLD UP. WHAT TF IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN!?!

You're so fake, Barbie was jealous of you!

You: Bro, this school picture is soooo ugly!! (Points to yours).

Me: Bruh, you just typed up mirror!

What do you call somebody with no nose?

Why did your mom cross the road?

You were on the same side as her, and she wanted to get as far away from you as possible.

What do you call a disabled Arab?

Artoo-Detoo (R2-D2).

What do you call a flat-chested emo?

A chopping board.

What do you call a disabled person in a fire?

"HOT WHEELS!"

What am I gonna do on the 5th anniversary of the Parkland shooting?

Shoot a load in you just like I shot those kids ;)

What is the difference between a light bulb and a pregnant woman?

You can't unscrew a pregnant woman.

What do you tell a depressed person?

Just hang in there!

When you let the school shooter borrow your pen so he doesn't kill you.

If you're pro-life, I hope you get hit by a bus today!

Your money, you bully's everything you hate.

I only have a few friends, like if you relate.

Based on a true story.

You're so poor that homeless people feel sorry for you.

You're so poor that you can't pay for a public school.

"(My beard actually connects.)" "Like the connection you never had with your father."

Are you a school? 'Cause I wanna shoot kids in you.